2 Sep

Yesterday, I sent a letter an e-mail out to my family and friends. It sat open in my e-mail program for six hours before I finally had the courage to press send. Though I had planned for this day at least three months ago, I felt nervous and insecure. Here’s an excerpt:

Have you ever had a dream that seemed impossible? One of those things that drifted up from the back of your mind every now and then, or every single day? If you have, then you know it takes a lot of courage to make that big leap. To go from playing around with the what-ifs in your mind, to jumping from that cliff and saying, “Why not?”

This letter is my big leap.

Introducing intrinsic images: a personalized photography business

For the past few months I have been taking many steps—some big, some small—toward launching a custom portrait and small event photography business. Today, I’m asking you to walk along with me and become my first clients.

I was nervous because, like most of us, I live with a little voice that tells me I suck. It says, You’re just another Mom With a Camera. A walking cliché. It tells me all the things that aren’t good enough about me. It points out all my faults and weaknesses. It shows me all the people in the world who are better at doing this thing I want to do. It tells me that everyone’s going to laugh at me and call me stupid.

I’ve listened to that voice for a long time.

But for once, I’m telling it to shut up.

The result of all that shutting up is a six-month long march toward the launch of intrinsic images.

Self-promotion isn’t really an inherent part of my personality. I’m far more comfortable with  self-deprecation. This space will remain my personal space, perhaps increasingly so. It may also be silent off and on as I get used to the obligations of posting in the other space and maintaining the now ubiquitous Facebook page.

Not to mention all of that photographing, editing, and appointment-setting that goes along with having a portrait business. If you’d like to have a peek at what I’ve been up to, you can follow along at any of the places, below.

Good things, right now

27 Aug

I promised you more than photography and party planning. What you get instead, is a list. Of the good. Of now. Because there is much to report.

1.  Receiving a check for my first paid portrait session, weeks before I expected to book anyone.

2.  Lyra saying “I love you” spontaneously and heartfelt, at quiet moments, when I least expect to hear those words.

3.  Watching episodes of Good Eats with my three-year-old and watching her re-enact scenes with her play kitchen.

4.  Baking (and eating) a multi-layer celebration cake with my fourteen-year-old niece while she visited.

5.  Finding an owl feather and giving it to my daughter, who treated it like it was a sacred treasure.

6.  Planning an autumn road trip.

7.  Preparing to watch of one of my longest and dearest friends marry her ideal match.

8.  Finally putting to great use my expensive art school education.

9.  Discovering skills and strengths I never believed I had.

10.  Hanging photos on our walls that were taken by my  hand.

11.  Making this season’s blackberry syrup and drinking blackberry min iced teas.

12.  Eating my brother’s fried chicken, and discovering his is now better than my mom’s.

13.  Hanging out with my sister-in-law and watching low-brow television past midnight.

14.  Discovering a simple, 10-minute fish recipe that everyone loves eating.

15.   Watching Lyra pull tomato after tomato out of our garden and eat them like candy.

16.   Anticipating the change of seasons and the traditions that fall and winter bring.

17.   Reading The Lorax and The Giving Tree again as an adult.

18.   Receiving an unexpected offer to take a freelance graphic design project.

19.   Working during nap time.

20.   Grateful to have my best cheerleader still rooting for me after (nearly) thirteen years of marriage.

Photo Challenge: i heart faces | beach fun

24 Aug

I promise to share more in this space beyond party planning and photographs, soon. But right now I am knee deep in preparing for the launch of my first business, which is as time-consuming and financially draining as it sounds. More on that venture, soon…

In the mean time, let’s play along with this week’s beach theme from i heart faces. Unlike most weeks, I actually have several images to choose from for this one. Which is somewhat surprising, given that I am one of those heart-breaking people who live four miles from the Pacific Ocean; but a lifetime filled with body issues and years spent terrified of having my head submerged in water, means that the beach is really the last place I think of when I want to have a good time.

It’s not that I hate the beach. I’m just not drawn to it like I am to back country roads and mountain views. But,  several friends from our now-defunct playgroup for a day at the beach, where I took a series of images that I immediately fell in love with. I wish I could say I knew when that was going to happen. Some days I have it, and some days the muse just vanishes.

The image below was one my favorites from day. It’s probably not the best choice because you can’t see the ocean, or even the sand. Unless you take a look at her fingers…

beach_day-14

Please visit i heart faces to see all the other water-splashed, sand-covered faces for this week.