2008: Reflecting

5 Jan

From 20 Questions for New Year’s Eve Reflection by Simplemom.


Reflection Questions for 2008

1. What was the single best thing that happened this past year?

Watching my daughter crawl for the first time after months of frustrated rocking and air swimming, and managing to catch that moment on video.

2. What was the single most challenging thing that happened?

The two month period that led up to Lyra’s first birthday. It was impossible not to compare it with the anticipation of the delivery just one year earlier, and the weight of all of those thoughts activated a bad bought of PTSD.

3. What was an unexpected joy this past year?

The week I spent with my 12-year-old niece, J. Especially the two of us harmonizing during car trips.

4. What was an unexpected obstacle?


5. Pick three words to describe 2008.

motherhood, stagnation, connection

6. Pick three words your spouse would use to describe your 2008 (don’t ask them; guess based on how you think your spouse sees you).

lazy, quiet, better

7. Pick three words your spouse would use to describe their 2008 (again, without asking).

stressful, broke, frustrated

8. What were the best books you read this year?

Talk, Talk and the Tortilla Curtain both by TC Boyle.

9. With whom were your most valuable relationships?

Garrett, Mom. 

10. What was your biggest personal change from January to December of this past year?

I joined a play group and made a connection with other mothers.

11. In what way(s) did you grow emotionally?

Emotionally, I have grown more forgiving and accepting of my body’s frailty. There are definitely times where I become resentful of it. But this is much less than a year ago, where all I could think about was how much it had let me down. I hated how the nagging pains and sensitive incision continuously reminded me. But as the pain has regressed and new agonies–such as my injured knee and my daily pill regimen–have taken stage, I’ve let go of a lot of the self loathing. I’m fragile. I may as well get over it. 

12. In what way(s) did you grow spiritually?

I can’t say that I have.

13. In what way(s) did you grow physically?

Um…bigger? Is that the appropriate response? I can now wear pants most of the time, but I still have to unbutton my jeans if I’m going to sit for long. Sitting longer than hour in anything but the loosest pants and skirts is torture, but I usually bare it for the sake of fashion. 

At the end of the year I decided to stop relaxing my hair. I’d been toying with the idea for a while, and decided to just commit. Growing out the hair will occupy a lot of my attention in 2009. Perhaps 2010.

14. In what way(s) did you grow in your relationships with others?

Toughie. Relationship-wise, things have been quite challenging this year. But my biggest accomplishment would be joining a playgroup and meeting some other moms. I haven’t managed to make any of these women more than casual acquaintances, but even that takes a lot for me. 

15. What was the most enjoyable area of managing your home?

It’s all a challenge right now. It’s very hard for me to mention a single area because I don;t feel like I have a handle on any of it. I’m just managing to get through.

16. What was your most challenging area of home management?

All of it is a challenge, but I find bill paying to be the biggest. It generates a ton of stress for me and a lot of tension between Garrett and I. And, it represents the monthly cost of my being out of work and as the months have gone by, that cost keeps getting higher.

17. What was your single biggest time waster in your life this past year?

Internet surfing.

18. What was the best way you used your time this past year?

The times I’ve chosen to meal plan along with the hours of prep work. 

19. What was the biggest thing you learned this past year?

That I really miss seasons. Watching a toddler all day is harder than watching an infant, but it’s more fun. That I actually prefer baking to cooking, though I’m better at the latter. Unhealed sadness from childhood can sneak up on me, if I’m not careful.

20. Create a phrase or statement that describes 2008 for you.

The year I ventured out, again.

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